July 5, 2008

Ram Balram - Never let Ajit near your family

Ram Balram, what can I say, a hilarious movie when it wasn't supposed to be hilarious. I love this movie because I guess its a goodbye song to the lost and found genre of the masala 70's, as each actor here looks a bit past their masala days. Please attack me if I'm dissing Amitabh and Dharamendra but in this movie what caught my eyes were the oldness of these 2 men, their slowly approaching wrinkles, and saggy chins! Alas it was made by Vijay Anand who throws every masala plot in here, which is very silly but lots of frothy fun.
  • We start off in Bollywoodland with 2 brothers who are called Silly, Stupid, and Ajit as I couldn't find their names in the credits or imdb.
  • Silly and Stupid are great friends as well as brothers, Silly has a son called Ram(Master Lucky, in a good role) and Stupid is a widower with a son called Balram(Master Sandeep, who has funny rushed dialogue delivery) and they also have a loafer brother Chief Jagatpal (Ajit) who obviously doesn't do his police work properly and visits the brothel everyday to see Tarabai(Helen).
  • A few family fights and arguements later, Jagatpal has pitted Silly against Stupid, and I named those names suitably because Silly gets angry because Stupid is shirking his duties to visit the courtesans and Stupid is stupid because he lets Jagatpal introduce him to the bad courtesan and sharaab!
  • Jagatpal then makes the brothely pyar turn to hate by making them have a shootout, Silly and Stupid do not fire at eachother, but its Jaggu's gun! A bit sadness with screechy violins occurs, and it is the funeral,
  • Silly's wife who I'll call Ma(Urmila Bhatt) leaves Jaggu her paisa of course! But he wants more than her money he wants the maa also, she is a good maa and refuses with this strange insult. He then throws her overboard in some water and shoots her.
  • Then Jaggu takes the two kids Ramu and Balu away, and he is obviously a complete nut job and sadist too as he has lost one leg and under his crutches features a nail which he uses to punish the kids if they do something bad, this was probably a sad part as the screechy .
        • Bechari Master Sundeep!
  • Ramu is Jaggu's slave now as they send Balu to school, but Ramu's bad deeds for his baap as they call him is fishing in the sea, stealing gold, and many other terrible deeds, a few years later Balu grows up as Amitabh Bachan who stills looks long,lanky, but his signs of aging all occur on his face with a saggy double chin and other wrinkles, while Ramu grows to be Dharamendra who ages okay but has got a bit of a beer belly.
  • Balu is a good inspector while Ramu is a bad kid working as a mechanic still doing bad things for his baap. Ajit's sadistic streak has traumatized Balu obviously as when a beggar with crutches comes along he jumps up, and is still scared of "the stick from HELL!
  • Balu-poster child of crutch trauma
  • Ajit is grumpy and disgruntled with the world and wants to live in a massive house across from his beach hut. So he thinks of a plan to make Balu do some more bad things for him, and Balu a policeman gets a bit hesitant but no complaining or he'll receive a stab from the crutch of hell! So he also devises a plan with his department to bring down his horrible baap
  • Naturally with 2 heroes you need 2 heroines, we have Rekha for Amitabh and Zeenat for Dharam, Zeenat has a bigger role as she plays Ramu's partner in crime, she is also Helen's daughter who wants revenge from Jaggu, who appears to be Zeenat's dad! NAHHHHIII you say, how can they fall in love if they are related, they aren't as Ramu finds out, but the film also features some very naughty innuendo such as playing on a see-saw(You know its dirty!) and these two:
  • Rekha only hugging happens on a bed!
  • There is a horrendous amount of filler here, including some lost and found father for Zeenat, Amjad Khan as a dim villain, Prem Chopra going to rape Zeenat, and more silly stuff and sexual imagery with the flowers and bees
  • The climax point is a lot of fun as Jaggu kidnaps all the ladies Rekha,Zeenat, Helen, and UTPAL DUTT, who must be a woman, coz Jaggu shouts "I have all the women in here, come take them away!" pooor Utpal. It features these glorious subtitles that are worth the watch!
His hands holds the bharat!
Prem Chopra doing some scooting


ajnabi said...

Ah, crutch trauma. A sadly growing malady among the nation's youth. Thank goodness this movie sheds some light on the problem.

Also it looks like it sucks. At least I know to avoid it now! :-D

Rum said...

I dunno why I got it but it was a 4 in 1 dvd of some Amitabh movies, yes crutch trauma affects millions daily please donate to the Balu trauma fund

memsaab said...

You hit the nail on the head (no pun really intended) with the filler comment. There is SO MUCH pointless filler that the plot, such as it is, is completely subsumed by it. Very bad, very bad. :-)

Rum said...

lol your review was very concise and i managed to point out the most silly points in the movie! i should zone out more! it was toooooo much filler that was unecessary!