August 28, 2008

Zindagi Ka Soundtrack - If Only!

I saw this great post by Ramsu, and veracious' great choices so I decided as the youngest and most indoctrinated since 2 blogger, that I simply must give this a go. This is the best use of my time during these summer hollidays.
Rules of the tag: Various situations are given. You have to come up with a song ( or a couple) that aptly describe those situations in YOUR life.

Opening credits: the title song from "The Burning Train" not a very happy start but squeaky sounds, the electronic voice, and the big brass brand in the back, from the start you know that my zindagi ka soundtrack is going to be a completely funky movie!

Waking up: "Accident Ho Gaya" from Coolie, a very wake up song because it has the screechy violins and it starts with him screaming Allah Rakha. And obviously in the film of my life I have a handy Sheroo from Coolie and Dharam-Veer. And it starts off with "Two young 'uns head out for some mischief" which oviously ends up in a Accident and then an agreement~

Average Day: "Sar Jo Takraye" from Pyaasa, if it was truly an average then I would be comforted by Johnny screeching "Maalish" and offering to maalish my head after a long day.

First Date: "Yeh Raat Bhigi Bhigi" from the old Chori Chori, a completely sweet number where I would have the first date in a garden and run around in abandon like sweet Nargis. And its nice and coy and quietly coquettish from both male and female points of view.

Falling in Love: My falling in love always has to entail running in a field and around a tree, simply because thats my nineties Bollywood indoctrination kicking in so it'd have to be "Pyar Ye Jaane Kaisa Hai" from Rangeela, its the lyrics that are soo sweet the heartbeat sounding drums always get to me and of course I dream of Jackie Shroff in his good days running around on a cliff with me!

Love Scene: "Dum Bhar Jo Munh Phere" from Aawara, a quietly erotic song that is so great that the girl sings most of this song instead of the boy in complete pursuit, so sweet so sexy so lilting!

Fight Scene: "Theme from Don" from Don, a really funky instrumental with blaxpoitation style horns, and some odd bird sounding start, but it has complete dishoom dishoom sounds so its all good.

Breaking Up: "Tu Hi Bata Zindagi" from Armaan, the lyrics are very poignant and all I can remember is seeing my Anil Kapoor cry and when he cries you know he's real sad!

Getting Back Together: "Yaadon Ki Baraat" from Yaadon Ki Baraat, my favorite reunion ever, it didn't imply back with love so getting back with your lost brothers is better, I think it should be used in any lost-and-found movie ever made(maybe not)

Life's Okay: "Khalbali Khalbali" from Rang De Basanti

Mental Breakdown!: "Disco Bhangra" from Ganga Jamuna Saraswati, listening to this horrid song induces mental breakdowns for me, it also makes me want to throw a pie at Laximant Pyarelal for making this song, because as a Punjabi I know for one thing you can never mix dico and bhangra

Learning a Lesson: "Ohh Meri Maa" from Maa, from my favorite bhanged elephant movie, it taught me the lesson never to hurt animals and sell them to a circus, otherwise an elephant maa will escape and stamp on my own.

Driving: "Hum The Woh Thi" from Chalti Naam Ki Ghadi, my only favorite Kishore movie, because it has so many cute horns and car sounds and yodelling

Deep Thought: "Jane Woh Kaise" from Pyaasa, a very melancholy song of how nasty the world is makes me think about the darker side of the world

Flashback: "Mujhe Peene Ka Shauq Nahin" from Coolie, a song flashbacking to tell me never to drink again, if only Devdas and Amitabh in Muqaddar ka Sikandar listened to this! Kaash!

Partying!: "Aja Aaja" from Teesri Manzil, this is a shimmy and twisty inducing song for me, especially Rafi's Elvis like singing

Happy Dance: "Teri Rab Ne Banaya Jodi" from Suhaag, my favorite Punjabi song, and Amitabh in his Bhangra gear is just fab, and it makes me want to dress in my punjabi gear and dance in my nearest park.

Regretting: "Aage Bhi Jaane Na Tu" from old Waqt, its soo sad and shimmy-inducing

Death Scene: Zindagi Toh Bewafaa from Muqaddar Ka Sikander, cheezy is just how I like it!

Closing Credits: Like veracious mentioned the mishmash of rap-and cheezoid hip hop numbers that are done at the end, the most fitting in my life's soundtrack is "Race is On my Mind" from Race or the recent title song of Singh is Kinng with Akshay looking cool without the silly neckerchief and beard. It must also end with a nonsensical love statement a la Yash Chopra. Mine would be Rum's Love is Life or It's All About Loving your Rum in pink letters!

August 23, 2008

A Blobby Man called Raj Kapoor

Those green eyes, that mush, that blob!
Please don't be offended by this article and my calling Raj a blobby man, its an endearing quality that he had when he got tubbier and his way of acting reflected his cuter heftier figure as I mentioned in Beth's Dulha Dulhan post. I am in love with Raj Kapoor, I could forgive any mistake he has ever made including the "ugly duckling is actually see through saree beautiful" Satyam Shivam Sundaram and the "lets be scandalous and show Mandakini's knockers in a waterfall" Ram Teri Ganga Mili. I have read his biography and his sad childhood trauma of losing his two brothers and falling out with Shammi and Shashi made me say awwwwww you're so misunderstood and most of the sadness happens in a pre-blobby Raj.
But as Raj Kapoor got blobbier his acting roles made him a nicer character, this slightly refers to Shammi also but his maybe double chin-cute-itis, but this i'm sure Memsaab could explain. Raj's tummy grew and his roles were very sympathetic and .....blobby. In a list of sweet blobbiness to sickly blobbiness I will attempt to explain.
  1. Dulha Dulhan - I watched this a long time ago on Zee Cinema, and I noticed that Raj was a bit blobby, but this was when he was in the beginning stages of being a balloon, his character was realistically sweet living in the Bombay metro and living with a cutey Sadhana and when he dresses her up as a bride that for me summed up his realistic-sweet-blobby he was, and the eyes are also a place to show his sweetness, and his pain. In the beginning stage of blobbing up,this film shows the sweetypie style of blobby acting.
  2. Chhalia- A horrendously disjointed Partition film, this reflected Raj's blobby-social speech type acting. He was a bit less blobby here, in his biography he said he wore the same pants from Aawara and stretched them out and it split in his bum area but he carried on wearing them. Chhalia was a really socialistic character that was a little aawara and a laloo when it came to talking love with Nutan. And the sweet blobby moment was when he asks Nutan to compose a letter to herself addressed anonymously from Raj, the way he looks at her and looks back at the paper reflected a complete earnest love that was soo unattainable that after he just looked dejected. His blobby sweetness meter was off the rocket when he sang a social song about Rehman ditching his wife like Ram did to Sita in "Galli Galli Sita Rote"
  3. Kal Aaj Aur Kal - not much to say in this mess of a movie starring grandad Prithviraj son Raj and Raj's son Randhir. In this movie his blobbyness was underused as he became sacrifice-myself-blobby style of acting. His pleading face was a constant expression in the movie as "ohhh grandad hits son" cue to sacrificial and sad face
  4. Mera Naam Joker - at his absolute blobby brilliance in this sprawling sweetness of a movie. There were many stages of blobby in the movie such as self indulgent-blobby acting as he shows a slideshow sequence of his movies Aawara and Shri 420, and then sweet joker acting as he acted as a genuine clown. He was sooooo sympathetic in this role that every time he got his joker doll back and the zoom of his blobby beautiful sad face made me cry. As a whole on the blobby-meter he was allegorical-symbolic joker-blobby acting, which meant that this was a symbol for the movie world where he is an entertainer(joker) that has allegorical meaning (such as Raj's life and the joker's life.
  5. Lastly All around the World - a campy kitschy movie version of the Jules Verne novel, in this movie he was all over the place, he was generally very sweet but he was overly joyous and over the hills maybe a bit like Shashi and Shammi acting but on E and cofee. I think Rajshree looked scared to act in case his happiness would bite her. I would say he was a Over the Moon-blobby sweetness.
Raj Kapoor was restrained sometimes in his pre-blobby roles in the 40's-50's but he was generally maudlin and morose or unhappy in his bad or thinking roles. But when he got blobbier he got sweeter and his roles reflected a happier side of his acting and as a person apparently. In most of his blobby roles he played different versions of the Raju the tramp character that he adapted from Charlie Chaplin. This sweetness was abundant and jumping out of the screen type happiness that he exuded, you could call him an overacter but for Raj being blobby and being Raju also made a completely good actor of him, a type of tramp that could relate to the masses.
His cuteness may be coupled with the fact that he was podgy and played his comedy roles sweetly, but with his power of blob and of the comedic Raj Kapoor could have been 500lbs and i would loved him still!

August 19, 2008

Singh is Kinng- How Akshay became Rum's King

Akshay is my kinngg!
After reading Shweta and Filmi Girl's positive reviews of this movie, I decided to watch it and boy was I happy afterwards. The Public Enemy song "Don't Believe The Hype" really doesn't apply to me, because whenever I see an Akshay it is hyped to the max,but I end up loving all the same.
As a Punjabi, my heart sort of swelled when I saw this film, Akshay looks very good in the movie and his accent and diction is spot on.
The story: In Australia somewhere there is the KING(Sonu Sood) the big dreaded gangster of the town, miles away in a Pindh there is Happy Singh(Akshay Kumar) an absolute nuisance to the villagers, they hatch a plan to get rid of Happy by making him bring back Lucky to the village,and restore some izzat back to the village and the Punjab. He takes along his friend Rangeela(Om Puri) as well, but at the airport they accidently switch tickets and they both end up in Egypt. Over there the usual love story occurs with Sonia(Katrina Kaif) a lawyer in training, Happy falls in love but has to go back. When they go to Australia, Lucky rebuffs them and sends them packing till Happy meets a Maa(Kirron Kher). With some coincedences and Happy saving Lucky, Happy becomes the king.
I like most of Anees Bazmee movies because the humour is very broad and stupid, but I am a easily impressed by everything he makes since he did make my favorite remake of "Pyar to Hona Hi Tha" and I even forgave him for Welcome which did star my favorite Anil Kapoor. Singh is Kinng is a great movie showing the Punjabi community as the heroes in the movie not just the loud sidekick or a comedy introduction. But the preachy parts did get a huge eyeroll from me especially the 'lets help out the black kid' one ahhhhhh, but the "omg she's my daughter" one had less of an eyeroll because Sudhanshu was soooo HAWT!
Akshay Kumar, VAAAAH VAAAH . I loved him in this movie, he was a great hero and he didn't go and stalk Katrina like I though he would, and he looks awesome in a Pagh. His Punjabi dialogues were fun and he said them with the right Punjabi accent. And through this movie the backwass that was Tashan was forgiven.He is just charismatic in any movie, he was funny and silly as Pindh di Happy, but when he became stick-on King he was just as suave and sexy!
Katrina was alright, but she was just there as some arm candy but she needs Hindi lessons or something coz her Hindi was very Americanized. Neha Dhupia on the other hand was great and had a better role as she wasn't the moll but was part of the gang, and her filmi dialogues were funny. Sudhanshu Pandey, Yashpal Sharma, and Manoj Pahwa were all good in their respective roles. Kirron kher was good in the usual maa role. Ranvir Shorey was deliciously horrid as Puneet.
The music was just excellent, the video for the first Singh is Kinng song was a bit over the top, nevertheless the Snoop Dogg, RDB, and Akshay track was just amazing so much that usual looking gangster boys got up and start beating their chest and putting their fists in the air like Akshay, the track was crazy brilliant and the fact that Snoop Dogg wore a Pagh was the highlight!
Despite all the silly conroversies in the Punjab already, the movie did show the Punjabi people as they are, and goodness me their must be tons of Sikh gangsters every where. Singh is Kinng is a good funny above timepass movie!

August 15, 2008

Deewana - The Fugliest Movie Ever!

Shah Rukh talks of my overt stalkerish love for him
'Nuff said?
Amrish explains why his character does bad things
With Rishi's constipated face,you'd never guess he was a Rock King
Precursor: Shah Rukh does his version of a Dhoom stunt
The early grittier wetter Dard-E-Disco
Shah Rukh jumped in a well after wearing the 2 piece suit~
Shah Rukh and Divya are both deewana with that shade of blue
Lovely fugalicious Jumper Rishi!
fugly pepto bismol colour for backup dancers!
The ugliest Punjabi suit ever composed
The mismatched in age but matched in fug heaven -couple!
The censored Lyric of the song "Dont Worry, Be Happy"
Especially aglow with that shirt on!
I thought I'd revisit an old foe of mine, Deewana is an attack on my eyes sooo many neons and two piece suits that are just so gawdawful! But looking now I see it as a wonderfully indulgent 90's film where dancing around the trees was back in fashion and done abundantly. There isn't much of a review here, a fugalicious filled screen capped review.
The movie starts off with Maa(Sushma Seth) seeing off her son Ravi(the overly blobbing Rishi Kapoor) who is a some sort of Rock God. They are seen off also by the two villains Baddie Dad(Amrish Puri) and Ranjeet-esque son(Mohnish Behl) who want the Maa's estate and dupe her in the hidden document signing way! Why the heck don't Maa's and wealthy characters read properly a document from a scary dad with a mole stuck on his face! Of course pyar happens with Pretty Girl(Divya Bharti-the tragic actress who fell out of a window a year after the movie) a girl who is a fan of his, they go and get married, but Baddie son and father need to bump them off and Ravi somehow through a wonderful dummy falls into a waterfall. Maa and bahu move to the city with Token Sympathetic Uncle played by my favorite of these roles Alok Nath with an equally fugly wig. In the city we meet the saving grace of the movie Lover/Stalkerboy(who else than Shah Rukh). Cue some misunderstandings, shaadi, and Ravi coming back.The movie was filled with a lot precursor shots from movies before such as jumping in the air like one as seen in Rang de Basanti and more. And an ending that echoes an early version of the Dil Se ending but with family and a bomb!

The only normal glasses in the movie

Lessons I learnt in this movie
  • Never be nasty to a step-brothers that look like Amrish and Mohnish!
  • Don't insult a step-brother, because due the insults and jealousy he will strap a bomb to your girlfriend
  • Don't become a widow if your dummy like husband falls in, check first and then only marry Shah Rukh Khan
  • Never wear a blue two piece suit...EVER...
  • Always use Manish Malhotra for outfits in any movie
  • Learn not to laugh when a swear word appears inanely as part of a sentence such as c**, c***

August 12, 2008

Movies, Movies all day long

When I visited Southall in London, I was soo happy to be back to the headquarters of DVDs, and I was very happy to receive original dvds too, not the suspicious kind that lies in a packet? But I have only 2 weeks till college so I hope i can review them all
AMar Akbar Antoneeeeee = genuine brilliant masala movie
Kabhi Kabhie = the Shash in strong coffee OTT mode! YAAY
Ram aur Shyam = two Dilips and Mumtaz!
AAg = the aahhh of Raj's first movie
AAH = TB makes you lie Raj!
Daag = Rajesh with Raakhee 'n Sharmila! Big Love Yash Chopra style
Shaan = crocodiles, the Shashitabh, and Kulbashan at his best
Mr.Natwarlal = Pardessiyyaaaaa
Devdas (old) = closer to the book, and Bimal roy = excellence
Zanjeer = Amitabh becomes MAD!!
Zameer = daku and horses drama with Shammi! and the tight jeans duo of the Vinotabh!
Leela = where Vinod looks smoldering at 50 or 60!
Abhimaan = JAYA is better than you Amit!
And many more coming soon!

August 10, 2008

Khoya Khoya Chand - Shiney shines!

All doom and gloom for Soha/Waheeda/Meena and Shiney/Guru/Dev
A movie that makes me stroke my invisible chin beard and wonder hmmm is a very good film in my books. However KKC made me do a little more "what!" and "Yeh kya baat hai!" it was like reading the trivia book by Mihir Bose, obviously Sudhir Mishra read this or investigate into every 1950's scandal and threw into the mixing bowl that is this movie. So I thought in this review I'd liken it to the scandals that are very glaringly apparent.
  1. 1. Nikhat (Soha Ali Khan) is first seen as a 14 year old with a pushy mother who forces her into dancing and acting in movies. This reminded me of Nutan who was pushed into movies at 14 also by her faded movie star mother Shobha Samarnath who took her out of the Swiss school she was in after her finances had disappeared.
  2. When we see Nikhat the second time she is older and falls into the company of Prem Kumar (Rajat Kapoor) a diminishing superstar. He uses Nikhat for his needs and also puts her in all his movies, but when he marries he still expects her at his beck and call. A very obvious allusion to Raj Kapoor and Nargis' relationship, she only achieved true fame after Aawara and that he wouldn't divorce his wife for her is very apparent in this movie
  3. Nikhat meets Zafar (Shiney Ahuja) a writer who has some serious daddy issues, he is very creative. He rids Nikhat of Prem's help and they fall in love, but when something goes wrong with their planned marriage he gets despondent. His friend (Vinay Pathak) tells him its too risky to cast her in Zafar's home production. A whole lot of shades of the Guru Dutt and Waheeda relationship here, with the movie in question alluding to Sahib Biwi Aur Ghulam where Waheeda refused the role of Chotti Bahu and ending their relationship.
  4. The side characters all seem to come from trivia books the tantrum throwing Ratanbala (Sonya Jehan), the yes man producer (Saurabh Shukla), the pushy and horrible parents.
The movie is very sporadic in its good moments, the love story between Nikhat and Zafar seems to be completely sexual, but the movie right from the outset talks of the sexual politics and using people for movies and etc... But did the two leads really love each other, maybe he loved her more adding to the Guru Dutt allusions abound that the movie has. What I liked about this was that it is completely brutal in showing the real life behind the golden era full of backstabbing sex and betrayals, and it shows how fleeting the movie industry is, one moment you are on top, the next -with Meena Kumari and Madhubala allusions- are gone.
The performances are brilliant, Soha though first seemed a bit too young but once she settles in she really shines, and Shiney seems to be the new art actor of these days, he embodies his Guru Dutt/crazy role very well and shines!(sorrrrry) Rajat Kapoor is very good as the selfish Prem Kumar. The supporting characters all have their good trivia etched roles, but Vinay Pathak and Sonya Jehan are great in cracking fiery roles!
The ending shot again showing the sleaze and the sex of the industry works well in conveying the movies message that behind the movies it isn't that pure.
Khoya Khoya Chand is a nicely ensemble filled movie, that works as a "Spot the Scandal" type of a movie which does make me stroke my beard and say "Vaah kya trivia hai!"

August 6, 2008

MaNoj MaD! MaNoj file CaSE!

I'm back in sunny humid Vancouver, after a delayed flight of 6 hours in the airport I saw the headline on Cineblitz! "Manoj Blows Up" I laughed at this because as Manoj Kumar has blown up in size but no Manoj has blown up at Shah Rukh and Farah Khan over that silly Om Shanti Om scene. After the impromptu patch up organized by Yash Chopra that was probably along these lines
SRK: I'm sorry Uncle
Manoj: You have hurt my already silly Bharat image! But I forgive u bete! Bharat the man is hurt, but Manoj the citizen is angry. Nikhal do!
Farah:Srk we'll keep it in ya?
Yash:Aren't i the lovely grandfather of Bollywood organizing this cheezzzy photo op!
Now Manoj has an almighty hissy fit over the scene and issued a court case against Shah Rukh, Farah and Sony TV who want to broadcast it this Sunday! Manoj why! That scene is so funny, its a little tongue in cheek, poking fun at his brooding acting quirk with covering his face. It makes me think, why would he be so offended I mean its a huge potshot at him, its just an endearing silly joke. Or is Manoj's ego so inflated that he can't take a little poke at his image, he doesn't have much to moan about. He's got his millions and his filmfare acievement awards?
Readers what do you think of this?